Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Harvey's is back on the list

It seems I have two lists.

This list deals with eateries I simply refuse to frequent.

I have a rather delicate stomach. It is my burden for being otherwise flawless. Even Achilles had a weakness, dontcha know.

My delicate stomach tells me when I am eating something less than healthy; a belated Spidey-sense if you will. I can eat a meal and tell within minutes if it was not exactly top shelf.

As a result of my gastronomic disasters, I have made note of restaurants and fast food joints that are classified "Off Limits".

For example:

Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC) - the deadliest of offenders. The foulest of fowls. Eating here is tantamount to bulimia.

Taco Bell - Te quiero, Taco Bell. But you don't love me back. You taste so good and cost so little, but you break my heart almost every time. You rip out my guts - the hard way.

McDonald's - I still haven't been back. 8 months. "F**k you, clown!"

Pizza Pizza - a recent addition to the list. It might depend on which location I eat at, but I've decided to no longer take the chance. Too bad: it ain't half bad and it's cheaper than Domino's.

For a good while, Harvey's (aka Starvey's) was on the list. In fact, I believe it was a founding member. Recently, however, I had placed it on probation; but it re-offended.

It's back on the list.

"There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once... shame on — shame on you.... Fool me, you can't get fooled again."
- George W. Bush The biggest fool on the planet.


Tristan said...

Phil, I think I've discovered your problem. You eat at AWFUL places.

PS said...

Not anymore.

Besides: gotta watch my girlish figure!

But I am an eatery whore - I don't bring a lunch to work, so I am at the mercy of the choices nearby. The healthy places are so expensive! It's like they're conspiring to make me fat!


Karmic-Angel said...

I know you won't be surprised, but i love to eat at those places.. add NY Fries and that is MY list of places i eat but should not. I in fact have an AA-type system set up for myself that I call a 'sponsor' (a friend or the husband) to talk me out of going and getting a hit of KFC or some other rot that will cause issues with my tummy. Did I mention that when I was pregnant, the only thing I could keep down my first few months was McDonalds? I am convinced its cause that is not real food, so my stomach did not object... Jason is convinced Connor will at some point sprout a third eye (ala Simpson's fish from Burns' effects on the environment)... but being Hindu, that doesn't bother me much... I have some lovely Gods with third eyes...

Michelle Sullivan said...


re: I have a rather delicate stomach. It is my burden for being otherwise flawless. Even Achilles had a weakness, dontcha know